Dad was surviving, but how long would he linger if he didn't start improving soon?
Tuesday and Wednesday were bad days. Dad was put on blood thinners because of the risk of COVID-19 creating blood clots. The hospital personnel thought that Dad’s blood pressure was fluctuating because as they tried to wean him off the ventilator, he panicked because he knew something was happening, but he wasn't conscious enough to understand. If only Mom were able to sit with him and hold his hand, it would be so much better for both of them. But of course that’s not possible right now.
Then came the call from the social worker that left Mom in tears. The lady asked about Dad’s living will and proceeded to tell Mom in no uncertain terms that even if Dad does survive (which was unlikely), he would probably be in a nursing home hooked up to a ventilator for the rest of his life.
Later, Mom was told that Dad is just too weak to keep fighting after being in bed for two weeks. Apparently, the virus was still active and they didn’t even know what to try next to help him. We were scheduled for a conference call with my brother, Mom, and the doctors on Friday to decide what to do about Dad.
In despair, I wrote to my friends: “Please, please ask God to grant Dad life. Please ask Him not to let Dad go like this without Mom even being able to touch him and say goodbye. Dad will be safe with Jesus, I know that. But my heart breaks to think of Mom not being able to be with him. When he left her in the car at the ER, he told her he'd be there for her to take back home, and now she doesn't know if that will ever happen. Today when she called Dad and talked to him, the volunteer said he raised his hand and tried to mouth words and we were hoping he would pull through. But now we have this bad news to process instead...
I keep thinking of the stories where Jesus raised the widow's son and Lazarus and He gave them back to their family and I keep praying He will do that for Dad.”
That night I cried and prayed and begged God to spare Dad’s life so that he could see his first granddaughter—I have two boys and my brother has three boys, but he and his wife were expecting a little girl in June. And I wanted so much for Dad to be able to see and hold her. And I prayed that He would let Mom and Dad celebrate their 50th anniversary in a year-and-a-half. Mom and Dad love each other so much. Throughout Dad’s hospitalization, I was often more worried about Mom than Dad. I knew Dad was sedated and had no idea what was happening, while Mom was in the midst of all the stress. I dreaded Dad dying without Mom even getting a chance to see him and say goodbye.
Thursday was a better day, as we were told that Dad was still holding his own and everything wasn’t as dire as we had been led to believe the day before. The good news was that my brother made a 3-hour-long mix of some of Dad’s favorite songs along with my brother and his boys saying things in between certain songs. I was able to get it uploaded to the hospital social worker who gave it to the hospital chaplain who downloaded it onto his tablet and then stood there and held it next to Dad for him to hear. As he was playing the songs, the chaplain heard my brother say something about “Since we can’t talk to you ourselves…” And the chaplain called to tell me that my brother and I could both call and talk to Dad and he’d be happy to hold the phone for us instead of going through the main hospital. What a blessing!! We had no idea that we could talk to Dad, too. So that day, thanks to the efforts of the kind chaplain, I was able to speak to Dad for the first time in more than two weeks--in between the tears.
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